OMG

Its what 7.15 am? Yeah. 7.15 am! I've been awake since 6 am i think. Rattling doors and a switch being turned ON and OFF, ON and OFF (what WAS that anyway?) have kept me awake and blessed me with the chance to start pondering life (and if i would be able to sleep again) since early this morning.

Oh yeah, long day at work yest and then the usual entertaining in the evening. I just thank N and S for taking the pressure off me - the pressure of hosting and pleasant conversation, you know what I mean?

I'm so tired. Seriously. Why does it feel like SO MUCH TROUBLE to host? I'm sick of hearing the criticism and the comments on EVERY SINGLE THING. I woke up berating myself for the limited patience and that i'd make up for it in the next 3 days. Hah! Fat chance!

I'f you're planning tell me to chill / relax, please to take the advice and shove it up you know where. You have to be in my shoes to even begin to understand.

There's SO much to say I don't know where to start. So I won't. (Deep breath, deep breath and let it all out in one big GAH!)