The Penguin has left for home and this post was supposed to come even before the earlier one... for some reason I couldn't get myself to dictate it .. So here goes ... to women .. again .. likely a section that this isn't addressed to .. definitely a section it IS.
- What is it about heels?
They're uncomfortable, they're bad for the back in the long term and really, no one even notices we're wearing them. So why do we put ourselves through the trauma of wearing them? Yes they look elegant to our own eyes, they endow upon our persona a grace we formerly couldn't notice, and maybe they make us feel good about ourself. But given the long term ill effects, are they really worth it?
- Why is being in good shape limited to before you get hitched?
No really. It's irritating when you make it seem like everything you do is in preparation to be married. Especially that weight loss thing.
How did you conclude that it was necessary to be thin before you got married, then during the wedding, and suddenly completely redundant once you're over the uncertainty of being single and done being in the public scrutiny of a 100 people, most of whom will criticize the food/ preparations/ clothes at your wedding anyway?
Why does it not matter to you anymore? I understand that many of us cannot control what we look like and how much we weigh, but it's just irritating when we can and choose to stop doing something about it just cause we're "settled"!
- What's with the need for a streak of "gray" in a man?
I've heard this so many times. This thing about how a man must have a little evil in him. Ah yes, that's where the charm lies no? Nice/ sweet/ good is boring. Let's bring on evil in regulated doses please! And when the evil manifests itself and goes from being adorable and quirky to being plain bad, then what? I don't know know myself, I think I even belong to the masochistic breed that proudly proclaims the above. Gah!
-Why do you feel obliged to do the done thing?
It's another thing to do it cause you want to. It's entirely another to do it cause "it's what's done". The wearing more salwars vs. jeans once married? The avoiding of temples and kitchens at "times of the month"? The participation in rites you don't believe in, no questions asked? Planning for yourself that extravagant wedding because so many others want you to, without so much as offering the possibility that it could be another way, a simpler, less expensive way? Why?
Imagine passing on symbolic inanities to the generations in the wings, vs. passing on a solid set of values? Imagine telling our own daughters they have to sit, talk and walk a certain way just because "you're now married". How long can this nonsense go on and get passed on? Can we please absolve ourselves of this cross that'll otherwise be ours to bear?
Please to be honest. Do we even try? To influence change? Trying will be enough for now. Our mothers aren't people we can influence too much, much less change completely. The least we can do is influence our children no?
- Why do we nit pick and nit pick and nit pick over the nicest men?
No really. A good friend has pretty much given up on my kind for how harsh we are (I'm one to talk given my last post!) esp to the nice guys. "You're looking for something you seem to not want to find" he says. Pretty much the same as the thrill of the chase for men no?
Why do we dismiss people so easily? Give them such few chances? After all that complaining about how there's such few good men out there, we eliminate them over the smallest of things - bad grammar, taste in music and blah like that.
Yeah, I know and maintain that when we do bump into someone we really like, it goes past so called documentable "flaws". But in the process, on the way, we're really harsh. And what's worse is we're helping each other feel OK about being that way by being "supportive" of like minded women friends. More gah!
I know i had more to put in here ... will edit and add as things come to mind ... Also, I know I come off as judgmental, and I don't necessarily care if you think I am, but suffice it to say, even I'm not above the things I've listed above.
There - I'll give you honesty, even if not impeccable logic :)