Saturday, June 13, 2009


*Note - This isn't a continuation from previous post.*
I've always felt like nature conspires to make me feel better when I'm going through an exceptional case of the blues. As lover of rainy weather, the way this generally goes is, the more upset I am, the heavier it rains, and the windier it gets.

Another weird phenomenon, not correlated with the blues is that weather in cities that I'm visiting does an about turn for the better as soon as I land, and goes back to normal the moment I'm on the flight out.

Cases in above points are my internship in Madras in 2004 (a 1st in 10 years summer showers spate kept the temperature at an unbelievable 24 to 25 degrees vs. the usual 30 something) all trips to the US in the last 2 years (bar the Jan end trip where I refused to leave the house for fear of freezing to death) and all days in Singapore where it has rained and made you go "WTF! It was bright and sunny until a minute ago, where did that rain come from?"


I've recently begun to feel very strongly that my job with its constant need for improvement and striving for perfection has only made me more and more critical of myself and others. Worse still, I'm now quicker than ever to point out flaws and trying to fix them. A perfectly fine attitude that might make me successful in the workplace, but risks alienating all the people I love with the constant need to have everything in place and on time.

I'm sure all jobs ask for perfection, so maybe this is just me responding in an undesirable manner to well intentioned conditioning that is supposed to prepare me for success? Or not?

What, if not that, explains my godawful penchant for pessimism which only seems to have gotten worse over the last few years?


How would you recommend one prepare themselves for a life of temporary isolation coming up ahead of them? Would you recommend they overdose themselves with social company so intense and frequent that the isolation feels like a relief when it does come?

Do you, instead, recommend they start on the journey already by simulating the lack of an active social life in their own life right now? By staying in Saturday nights, by not calling the folks they once called on a regular basis? By turning into a social recluse now, so that the eventual isolation is just a natural conclusion to a journey already started?


There's a terrible genetic flaw that runs through the women in my mother's side of the family - the tendency to shelter and protect others from any darkness so they can lead comfortable lives oblivious to the stress that exists in their midst.

All of these women are smart, educated, liberated and capable. All successful in their worlds outside the home. From where I stand, I wonder often why they let it happen at all.

Cause, this sheltering, although well meant, eventually makes the recipient so used to its business class comforts, that eventually he loses all will / capacity to grasp the import of problems, more so the tendency to tackle them head on.

This in turn leads to the women lamenting the years of pampering and sheltering the family, and intense disappointment at having to wade through all of life's troubles alone.

I wonder, sometimes, how far down the generations this genetic flaw travels.